Meeting Your Fling's Parents for Thanksgiving

If you're not careful, Thanksgiving could be the most terrifying day of your life.

It's stressful enough when you bring a new significant other home to meet the folks. But it downright blows when you have to meet his or her parents during the holidays. Face it, at Thanksgiving or Christmas, you're meeting not only the parents, but the whole damn family.

There are many do’s and don’ts when it comes to encroaching on another family’s Thanksgiving tradition.

The first thing to consider is if meeting the parents for Thanksgiving is a good decision or not. Going to your sweetheart’s family dinner can be the most rational next step in the relationship, but it can also be a disaster if the relationship is too new.

If you’ve only been dating someone for a week and he or she invites you to the family’s Thanksgiving dinner, that could be a red flag that this person may be way too clingy.

Before I let my boyfriend meet my family, I had to explain a few things... like the fact that my grandfather is a pastor and, if you eat before the prayer, you will be banished to Canada. If the relationship had only been a week old, I wouldn't have had the chance to tell him this. Without this vital knowledge, you could be walking right into a lion’s den.

WHAT TO DO IF THE FAMILY STARTS FIGHTING
No family is perfect. There is a reason why alcohol-related car accidents are more likely to occur during the holidays. Drinking alcohol can be tempting when forced to spend an entire day with your family.

One time, my sisters and I got into a fight during Christmas in front of my step-sister’s new boyfriend. He decided to add his two cents and say, "It seems like you both need to calm down and consider the other person’s perspective." My sisters and I stopped fighting each other and decided to aim our efforts on him. When a family feud begins to brew, lay low. It’s not your family and, if you try to intervene, you will look like the bad guy.

WHAT TO WEAR
More importantly, what not to wear. Shove the red pumps to the back of the closet and pull out the old sweater that your mom gave you in 1998. In fact, keep all the outfits that look like they could be on Flavor of Love in the closet and start thinking Kindergarten teacher. No mom has ever said, "Your girlfriend wore too many florals." Something classy and conservative is your best choice.

WHAT TO TALK ABOUT
We all know you’re just dying to bring up George Bush and Hillary Clinton, but leave the politics out of dinner conversation. Even if you think it’s a safe topic because you and your new fling have spent the last two months engaged in heavy conversations about presidential primaries and voting demographics, you never know where the parents stand on political issues.

One time, I got in trouble over a dinner conversation because I said the words "sexual orientation" instead of "sexual preference." Apparently, his parents felt strongly that homosexuals chose to be gay. I didn’t intend to open up Pandora’s box, but I didn’t know what else to talk about.

A cheap conversation trick is to ask about any random artifact in the house that looks like it may have family ties. Say something like, "What a pretty green vase." Or maybe say, "I love the paint color of the living room." Usually, these kinds of questions are perfect for meeting the parents, because they make you seem like you’re a genuine person and lead to a nice long story. Pretend to listen and you’ve bought yourself an easy 10 minutes.